I'm Not Striving for Perfection, I Just Don't Want to Make Any Mistakes!

I have heard the word "perfectionist" used at times to describe me.  I have repeatedly denied these claims as I do not ascribe to being a perfectionist.  I do not wake up each day and say to myself, "I am going to be perfect today."  I do, however, detest making a mistake.  What I did not realize is that I was creating a nearly impossible existence for myself and possibly for others around me, such as my children.

What drives the need to avoid making a mistake?  Perhaps growing up as a performance-driven, people-pleasing child had something to do with it.  Achieving and doing well in school was something I could control.  I was involved in numerous clubs and attempted to be the best at everything.  Now as an adult, that same drive has manifested itself as a type-A personality who is seen as a perfectionist.



A dear friend encouraged me to "STOP striving and start enjoying His blessings and His love."

"He is NOT judging your performance," my friend continued.

"He loves you…period."

God is not judging my performance.  He loves me.  Period.  And that is the key.  I am not here to please others.  I am here to please God.  Additionally, despite what my behavior implies, God does not have a notebook where he is checking off each accomplishment I achieve.  I am enough.  Just as I am, even if I do not accomplish another feat.  While at times I may forget this, I can always access one of my favorite scriptures, Psalms 46:10, which reminds me to, "Be still and know that I am God."

It also occurred to me that by not enjoying my blessings my focus was askew.  I was choosing to focus on what I thought I needed and not what I had in the moment.  I was not being content, which in turn grieved God's heart.

The same friend who reminded me that God is not judging me also shared a video with me by the artist Jadon Lavik.  Essentially, the song, What If states I belong to God despite what I do.  For someone who is accustomed to running like the Energizer Bunny, knowing I do not have to perform or please is very comforting.  

If you find yourself striving for perfection, know that God accepts and loves you unconditionally.  It is OK to simply be still.


Shatanese Reese is a freelance blogger and author of a future book who resides in Atlanta, GA with her husband and their six children. She enjoys walks on the beach and colorful sunrises. Shatanese’s goal is to find the extraordinary in every day moments. Follow Shatanese on YouTube, FaceBook, Twitter, Instagram, and Periscope.


Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

My Son, The Marine

Image
In just a few days my son will leave the comfort of our home to travel to Parris Island, South Carolina.  This is not a vacation adventure.  No, the trip is for basic training...to become a Marine. I fully support his decision to serve our country and have known for several months that this day would come.  So why do I have a lump in my throat and feel churning in the pit of my stomach? Recently, I was listening to National Public Radio (NPR) and the featured story of the hour was the involvement of the United States Marines Corps in World War I.  The Battle of Belleau Wood was cited as "one of the bloodiest and most ferocious battles U.S. forces would fight in the war."  This historic battle, which occurred near the Marne River in France, is where our soldiers received the nick name, "Devil Dogs."  This term of endearment was a result of the soldiers' diligence, ferociousness, sacrifice and valor exhibited during the battle. To hear the full story, visit:
Read more

Puzzle Pieces, A Lesson For Marriages

Image
My Sister in Christ, the beautiful Nakita Williams, facilitated an exercise a few weeks ago during We Honor Marriage at Word of Faith Family Worship Cathedral.   I am still thinking about the insights gained during our time together. She divided the class into four groups and gave each group a puzzle.   She told us to work together as a group and assemble the puzzles that were inside each box as quickly as we could.   We only had a few minutes to assemble our puzzles. In our group, we strategically began tackling the sides.   I immediately could tell we did not have all the pieces we needed to complete our puzzle and I said to the group, “We are missing some pieces.”   Everyone looked at the image on the box and assessed all of our pieces.   We kept working.   All the while, Nakita was walking around and calling out the remaining time.   We could hear at least one group cheering as they were nearing the end of their assembled puzzle.   The pressure was on!
Read more

Entertaining Angels

Image
As the last day of 2019 drew to an end, a recent experience placed me in a self-reflective state. While in Iowa to celebrate our daughter’s graduation from Iowa State, I rose early and headed to the hotel lobby to take care of a few business-related tasks. I immediately saw my cousin, who had traveled to Iowa as well for the celebration, enjoying a bite to eat and I chose a seat across from her at a table not far from the breakfast area.   A gentleman at a nearby table turned around to chat with us. He shared he was there for his granddaughter’s graduation and that he was retired. We all continued to chit chat for a few more moments until my cousin politely excused herself from the table to return to her hotel room and prepare for departure. Now with my cousin gone, I expected the friendly stranger to return to his cup of coffee at his own table. Nope. Much to my chagrin, he continued to chat with me. Remember, I was supposed to be taking care of some work-related tasks
Read more