I'm Not Striving for Perfection, I Just Don't Want to Make Any Mistakes!

I have heard the word "perfectionist" used at times to describe me.  I have repeatedly denied these claims as I do not ascribe to being a perfectionist.  I do not wake up each day and say to myself, "I am going to be perfect today."  I do, however, detest making a mistake.  What I did not realize is that I was creating a nearly impossible existence for myself and possibly for others around me, such as my children.

What drives the need to avoid making a mistake?  Perhaps growing up as a performance-driven, people-pleasing child had something to do with it.  Achieving and doing well in school was something I could control.  I was involved in numerous clubs and attempted to be the best at everything.  Now as an adult, that same drive has manifested itself as a type-A personality who is seen as a perfectionist.



A dear friend encouraged me to "STOP striving and start enjoying His blessings and His love."

"He is NOT judging your performance," my friend continued.

"He loves you…period."

God is not judging my performance.  He loves me.  Period.  And that is the key.  I am not here to please others.  I am here to please God.  Additionally, despite what my behavior implies, God does not have a notebook where he is checking off each accomplishment I achieve.  I am enough.  Just as I am, even if I do not accomplish another feat.  While at times I may forget this, I can always access one of my favorite scriptures, Psalms 46:10, which reminds me to, "Be still and know that I am God."

It also occurred to me that by not enjoying my blessings my focus was askew.  I was choosing to focus on what I thought I needed and not what I had in the moment.  I was not being content, which in turn grieved God's heart.

The same friend who reminded me that God is not judging me also shared a video with me by the artist Jadon Lavik.  Essentially, the song, What If states I belong to God despite what I do.  For someone who is accustomed to running like the Energizer Bunny, knowing I do not have to perform or please is very comforting.  

If you find yourself striving for perfection, know that God accepts and loves you unconditionally.  It is OK to simply be still.


Shatanese Reese is a freelance blogger and author of a future book who resides in Atlanta, GA with her husband and their six children. She enjoys walks on the beach and colorful sunrises. Shatanese’s goal is to find the extraordinary in every day moments. Follow Shatanese on YouTube, FaceBook, Twitter, Instagram, and Periscope.


Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Her Name Is Nina!

Image
Nina, my three year-old has developed a strong sense of identity.  There have been a number of instances where in my determination to not call her one of her siblings' names, I have called her "Sweetheart," "Honey" or even "Sweetie," to which she has replied, "My name is not Sweetie.  My name is Nina."  Initially, I chuckled at her cuteness and figured it was a one time occurrence.  But she has remained consistent.  Whether it is a family member or a cashier at a store who has made the mistake of calling her anything other than Nina, she has been quick to offer clarification. I was born with the name Shatanese over 4 decades ago.  My mom always told me my name came from an Egyptian queen.  I never researched this information and have chosen to live with a sense of mystery surrounding the origin of my name. Throughout my life, I have often been asked, "What does your name mean?"  Or, "What is the origin?"  These types o...
Read more

My Son, The Marine

Image
In just a few days my son will leave the comfort of our home to travel to Parris Island, South Carolina.  This is not a vacation adventure.  No, the trip is for basic training...to become a Marine. I fully support his decision to serve our country and have known for several months that this day would come.  So why do I have a lump in my throat and feel churning in the pit of my stomach? Recently, I was listening to National Public Radio (NPR) and the featured story of the hour was the involvement of the United States Marines Corps in World War I.  The Battle of Belleau Wood was cited as "one of the bloodiest and most ferocious battles U.S. forces would fight in the war."  This historic battle, which occurred near the Marne River in France, is where our soldiers received the nick name, "Devil Dogs."  This term of endearment was a result of the soldiers' diligence, ferociousness, sacrifice and valor exhibited during the battle. To hear the full story, v...
Read more

Angel Babies-A Lesson in Healing

Image
"I am sorry, Mrs. Reese.  The pregnancy is no longer viable."  Tears welled up in my eyes as the doctor continued with the final details of the visit.  I could not hear much of what was being said as I focused on the sense of loss I felt.  My body felt heavy and my spirit was grieved.  The appointment eventually concluded and I made my way to the elevator.  The doors closed and finally, I was alone.  Alone with my thoughts, fears, disappointment and sadness.  I became painfully aware that I was physically alone as well.  The small being who had been growing inside of me for the past several weeks was no longer there.  Gone...never to be held in my arms.  Suddenly, the elevator door opened and in walked a very pregnant woman.  I quickly looked at the floor, fighting back fresh tears.  As I exited the elevator, I could no longer hold back the flood of tears that had been threatening to ove...
Read more